...bathe. At least once. EVERYDAY.
...like music. On the regular. And live.
...be responsible for yourself.
...read. Not just know how, but enjoy it.
...love dogs. They will always be around....NOT have small children. Or an ex-wife who has been an ex- for less than two years.
...NOT drink to the point of stupidity.
...like to hike. But I do not camp.
...not be some psycho-jealous-everyone-I-hug-or-kiss-on-the-cheek-is-a-threat-to-you type.
...be goal-oriented.
...like to socialize. With my friends, your friends, all people.
...like to just hang out in silence.
...be smart.
...eat healthy.
...enjoy junkfood. Sporatically....like sports. Playing and watching.
...be an adult. In actions....enjoy goofing off.
...like adventure....respect my independence.
I'm making this list. This is the beginning of it. I've decided that it would be a fun little experiment to join a dating site. Instead of filling out the "About Me" section, I'm going to make it "About You". About all the things YOU, potential dater, should be. And if YOU happen to be all these things (and more, of course!), I may consider going to meet you for coffee. Oh, there's another thing...Must respect and enjoy coffee. Both inside and outside of the home. Because I am fiercly addicted to Starbucks.
I think this could be a fun time. I will first ask the potential (as that is what I have decided to term these un-named, faceless men) to read this list. If they find a few things on here that are them, they can move on. If they find themself in every line, then, yes, definitely contact me. I am tired of wasting my time with people who I want to change, who want me to change them, who are in no way compatible with me, who believe that flossing is not important (notice where it is on the list? It is important!).I haven't decided which dating site to attack yet, but that's my next step. For now, I'm trying to add to this list, I want it to be as complete as possible, I am not wasting anymore time.
On a sidebar, I am not negative or bitter. I am just completely at a loss as to why there are so many great guys out there that are great for other people. I am intensely picky. And I spend a lot of time in relationships trying to fix things I knew about going into the relationship, and that should not be the case. I want flaws to be cute and small. Not big and glaring.
Whether this works or not, we shall see. But I'm going to give it a go. I think the best part of all this is knowing that I'll know if they are lying right away and can get up and leave. And if they aren't lying, I'll meet some cool people who I have a lot in common with.
Too funny. Though I'm thinking it wasn't intended to be. I met my last love (actually, the love of my life) on match.com. And dated several guys previously from match.com and matchmaker.com. Those all worked out better than the guy I reconnected with on Facebook. Though I've heard great stories about FB matchups.
ReplyDeleteThe funny part is...I made all those lists over the years and, right before I met the love of my life I'd just had the last horrible date with a guy I'd been seeing for a few months (we'd met on match.com) and, sister, that last date was awful!
After it, I sat down and wrote him an email, from my heart, saying "I want someone who will do what he says, just because he says so; who will put his arms around me when I say I'm cold, not just tell me I'm not cold; who will take my hand and help me down the steps, not push me aside to make my own way (in heels no less); and will make me feel like I'm the only girl in the room." There was more, but that's all I remember right now.
Within days I met the man who turned out to be the love of my life. He was all those things. And an amazing Blues musician, to boot. I just wish I'd added "who will adore me as much as I adore him." 'Course, if I had, I'd still be in SoCal and not writing this novel. The cool thing is: we ain't done yet and the fat lady has definitely not warbled yet.
My point you ask??? A lot of those things aren't that important. It's the heart stuff, the real stuff, the how they treat you stuff that is. Don't forget to make a heart list, not just a complete head list. <3<3<3
Good luck! I have been doing internet dating for so long it feels like a job. Wouldn't it be nice to just meet someone and connect? Not have all the weird things between you and baggage- forget about it!
ReplyDeleteOk...the only comment I can think of right now is that I am totally freaking out over that love connection picutre.
ReplyDeleteThat is a pretty good list, but from a guy's POV, like, don't you care about more romantic things? I think there are some pretty big-deal breakers left off that list.
ReplyDeleteAlso, never mention the don'ts in these kinds of things. Guys are put off with women who start out with don'ts. Like, what's next?
Good luck with your quest!